Darthleon's Small Subjects 4

Darthleon's Monthly Wrestling article

I had a tone of fun writing about Ultima Lucha. I had so much fun that I in fact greatly considered doing a monthly article about wrestling. And then I decided against it. Why? Because it has nothing to offer, I have no drive for it and perhaps I won't have the time for it." But Darth , you are so smart and handsome , why do you say that you of all people have nothing to offer?" , I hear you say. Well I mean I have nothing to offer. I can't do an informational article as there is a tone of sites doing that and better and I can't do satire as a bunch of people do that and I suck at comedy. But expect wrestling to pop up on small subjects every now and then as this is where I vent small problems. Speaking of which...

The theme of RAW

WWE has some nice music nowadays. Back in my day there was a team whose main theme was about how they love potatoes. Thankfully WWE re-understood that when a wrestler comes out he needs a nice theme to make us care. So they hired CFO$ who essentially has written any good song the newer wrestlers have along with the themes of the 3 big WWE shows. Yet people dislike the theme of RAW . The reason behind it is great. Are you sitting? The reason is because it is not a rock song. Now for my audience that thought "So what?" good job for having at least have half a brain. And since I can predict the future and I feel you thinking I am overreacting I would like to word for word  quote  my favorite comment about the theme:"All they need to do is replace the song.I hate that the RAW is some gay pop song.I feel it should be a rock and roll type song, like how they have been doing it for years". I hope you read it with the voice of your stupid metal-head friend that looks down on any other kind of music(don't pretend you don't have one). Truth be told it is the weakest of the 3 themes. But it is not bad by any means and it fits the show well. It is called "Tonight is the night" and the lyrics say that if you want to make it , well, tonight is the night to give it your best shot. Which is RAW in a nutshell. It is the biggest of the 3 shows and where the most plot happens. NXT is NXT and no one cares about Smackdown to the point that CM Punk was Jesus during it. WWE editing team has also done a great job with the imagery (I especially enjoy the Orgasming Fangirl) using the song to its full potential. Too bad WWE is using CFO$ like its wrestlers and gives the big projects to part timers and guests like Lovato while the people that essentially work for them everyday get a 30 second soundclip.

 The Stanley Fever Dream.

Yeah I know I am  late to this party but I really want to say my piece so here goes. I was told that the Stanley Parable is a great game and its has choices and stuff so I decided to know as little as possible until I got to play it. In case my 20 reviews of Heavy Rain hasn't tipped you off I like games with choices and I got excited that I would add another game in my list. But when I got on to Stanley Parable there was nothing there for me. For starters you don't get choices. You get 1 choice over and over again: Will you do as told this time? The little god like figure tells you something and you answer with yes or no. Over and over. And I guess it would be ok-ish if those choices affected the story in any way. My title actually refers what this game's story felt to me. You know how a fever dream goes. You see something ,then things happens with different levels of involvement from your side , then you sort of wake up and you are back to square one. You might  go through a bunch of rooms , you might fall from a cliff or you might see a minimalist allegory of what it feels like to be in a modern day family ( which btw makes me kinda concerned about the developer) but you will wake up and your brain presses ctrl-z and you are back in the office. Told to make the same choices again. Ooh well. Guess this game is not for me.

Minion Movie: It's your fault Internet.

This is why product creators should stop looking online for ideas. Movies like Minions do not work. They have never worked and never will work. The minions were comic relief.They were the butt end of the jokes and the initiators and victims of  almost all the slapstick. They were the background in a semi-comedic drama of a man trying to balance his peculiar job, his financial problems , his own need for success and fame ,and his new found fatherly love for these three little girls. The minions were there to bring relief from that for us and the characters themselves.  People loved them because they were funny, kinda cute and easy to redraw and re-invent to your liking leading to the mass production of memes and photos that plague facebook to this day. Which in turn lead Universal to think that what people wanted were more minions.  When in reality what people want is good movies for the kids to shut up for 2 hours so they can have sex . The parents , not the kids.